VDAY Weekend.

Short and sweet;


Spent the weekend with 2/3 of my best friends D'Andrea & Angela). Went to dinner and a movie on Saturday and then lunch on Sunday.

Patrick sent me choc. covered strawberries and a big ass teddy. Next best thing to him being here. Just love him!!!



Going to the zoo tomorrow with 2/3 again {D'Andrea & Alethea) with the kiddos cuz its faaaareeee!! And just a good fun day out the house.


Overall been a good few days.

LDR part 2

This shit is getting old fast.

He's dropped another scenario on me.

Just when I thought I could start planning our life...I can't because things are changing again. WTF..Oh well I love him..things will work out. We'll be fine.

LDR

This LDR shit sucks. Every few weeks I fall into a funk, and here we go again. I've only cried twice this separation so that's a plus but damn...I'm sick of missing him. I just want him here or me there or us SOMEWHERE TOGETHER. ugh.

I don't shit else to add....

[sigh]

BHM

http://www.thegrio.com/black-history/thegrios-100/thegrios-100-teresa-king.php

Hello February.

So January overall was a sucky ass month. It had some high points. But overall it was a total drag. But January did mark 7 months into this year long separation. I have no idea how that's gonna work out, but it will. I love him TO DEATH. Speaking of love.


Ex decides its ok to message me on YIM and "propose to me" WTF?? He usually pops up every now and then to confess his love and affection and gets the same response ever time. I'm committed leave me alone. Deleted him from my YIM but it does me no good because of course I'm still on his..I'm even permanently invisible and he still messages me. Time for a new YIM name. Done & Done. But I just don't understand. It has been a LOOONG time since we've been together like AWHILE. How can one still be attached to another the way he is. Like his feelings are still strong like we just "broke up" (we were actually never official because he wasn't "ready for a relationship") I just don't understand what I did to him to make him this attached. I should feel flattered, but I'm not I'm actually feeling nothing but sadness for him. He could really make someone happy if he would just let me go. And then I made a status update about it and some girl asks "how does your bf feel about this" Girl you don't know my Lovey..he feels exactly how I do..laughing at it and moving on. He is in no way shape form or fashion insecure about my feelings for him. NOPE.

All of that made me appreciate Lovey's love for me and mine for him even more..it's just amazing.


Today was an overall good day. Each day I smile because I have such amazing people in my life. My MM girls being at the top of the list. They really came thru for me on my birthday and I've made some great friends [a few of you heffas are reading this so yes I'm talking to you lol]. I can't wait to look back on MM in a year and laugh at some old things and admire our growth and the things we made it thru [deployments, separation, family drama, pregnancy, etc] It's all pretty great.

I have 3 days off. I'm going to be productive with my life if this cold doesn't beat me down..my throat is sore..trying to fight it off..Must...Be..Strong..

Plan to mail of Lovey's CP..I suck at life..I'm gonna need to get a bigger box but keep it under 50 lbs.

Black history fact for the next 27 days to come.

-One Love.

My plan

So I'm leaving for the Air Force April 13th 2010. I have a lot of things on my mind as well as a looooot of stuff I need to take care of and deal with before I go.

I'm nervous and excited all at the same time. Some of my family is excited for me while others...not so much.

Pat is 100% supportive of me and I couldn't ask for a better man, he's amazing I can't wait for us to finally be in the same space for more than 3 days. I joke about how much I hate the military but I really don't I'm grateful that he had the opportunity join up and see the world and deploy and grow up. Now it's my turn, I hope I get out of it what I should. I look forward to this challenge. It's amazing how I'm soo set on getting OUT of here. I know I'm gonna miss so much, like my friends and my god children growing up but hell I gotta do something with myself. I needed a kick in the pants to get myself back on the right track. I was mad at myself for taking a break from school and moving back home, but I didn't really have any other options. This...is another option, I'm opening doors for myself. I want to be great at something. I gave up swimming and music because they weren't fun for me anymore when I probably could have done amazing things with one or both of those talents. I won't let myself do that. I will go to the military and strive to better than my own expectations.

sigh it's 7am I need to go to sleep, but I can't stop thinking about the future and about all the things I want.

I love him and want him here with me.

I want to be an amazing airman.

I want to make myself and my family proud.